December 16, 2013
One of the most striking things about the priestly/Paulist formation process is its “marathon-esque” quality. True, in the thick of things it can feel like time is dragging along and the finish line is light-years away. But at a time like Thanksgiving and Christmas, where school is shut down and some of the usual formation activities are minimized, we all get time to pause and consider where we are, and where we’ve been.
For me, it is six turkeys later. No, I did not consume six turkeys on Thanksgiving. Every year we buy a couple of 20+ pound turkeys for all the gang here at St. Paul’s College. This, remarkably, has been my third Thanksgiving at “SPC,” so that makes six turkeys. On the one hand, I can’t believe it’s already been that long sine I entered formation. On the other hand, I can’t believe I still have six more turkeys (or less considering pastoral year at another foundation next year) to go.
I am using this delectable piece of holiday poultry to lead us to a grander insight – one that I have to continually remind myself of.
I hear seminarians all the time say something like: “So how long you got left? 3 years? That’s not bad.” I totally appreciate all that this represents: formation is not the end-goal. Ain’t none of us in this to be in formation. It is, rather, a reality that every priest has encountered to become what he is. It is part of answering the call.
But what a waste to live only in anticipation of what will be.
Think of this on the grander scale. We all know that we are destined for eternal life with God in the Kingdom. The Gospel tells us so. But does that mean that we don’t love, sacrifice, pray, give thanks, care for the poor, speak for the voiceless – now in our present day? Nay.
We are each here, in the present moment, for God’s good reasons. I don’t need the collar around my neck, nor the chrism oil on my hands to be the Stuart God wants me to be right now. I can spread the Gospel. I can be a person of justice and mercy. And importantly at this time of the year, I can give thanks for the life (yes, even formation life) that I have right now.
Indeed I am tremendously thankful for the place I am in now. I am thankful for the ongoing chance to discern God’s will for my life, and to grow in holiness as a Christian man. I am also thankful for the thing that called me to remember this “live-in-the-now” insight on which I presently reflect. I am thankful for my Paulist brothers, and for the four novices with whom I share a home and a common mission.
Thanks be to God for this, and every day I am afforded as a seminarian and Paulist in formation.